What do you call a bunch of scared bulls & heifers?
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A cow herd!!
Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
What did the cook say after he burnt the hawaiian pizza?
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I guess I better cook it at aloha temperature next time!
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I guess I better cook it at aloha temperature next time!
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
Why do aardvarks like going to school?
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Because of all the students!
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Because of all the students!
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
Why do IT Professionals tend to drown a lot?
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Because they tend to choose synching over swimming.
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Because they tend to choose synching over swimming.
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
help me understand this one.ArrylT wrote:Why do aardvarks like going to school?
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Because of all the students!
You own this thread! Surprised no1 else has thrown one down...
This one is a lil more PG-13 but here goes..
How did Ken never get Barbie pregnant?
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Because Ken always came in a different box.
10 team | 10 Keepers | .5 ppr | QB | RBx2 | WRx2 | RB/WR/TE | WR/TE | K | D/ST
QB: Burrow | Prescott
RB: Chubb | Dobbins | Sanders | Edwards-Helaire | Patterson | Edmonds | Henderson | Edwards | Benjamin
WR/TE: Moore | London | Kelce | Cooks | Lockett | Lazard | Parker | Jones
QB: Burrow | Prescott
RB: Chubb | Dobbins | Sanders | Edwards-Helaire | Patterson | Edmonds | Henderson | Edwards | Benjamin
WR/TE: Moore | London | Kelce | Cooks | Lockett | Lazard | Parker | Jones
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
Haha thats a good one!
Box is another slang word for beaver / flower / honey pot if you catch the drift ...
Box is another slang word for beaver / flower / honey pot if you catch the drift ...
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
Unless you were referring to mine - wasnt sure which joke I was supposed to clarify lol.
If it is mine its another pun based on slurred pronunciation. So students is pronounced - stewed ants.
A lot of these puns work better when spoken than written lol.
If it is mine its another pun based on slurred pronunciation. So students is pronounced - stewed ants.
A lot of these puns work better when spoken than written lol.
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
What do you call a group of nuns that walk around a lot?
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Roamin' Catholics
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Roamin' Catholics
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
What kind of records are never in a hurry to get played?
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Patient records.
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Patient records.
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
I actually liked this joke a lot better before you explained it. I assumed it meant that bald guys never get laid unless they pay to "get on" a hooker, and paying to ride the bus is just a harsh reminder of that sad reality. It seemed way edgier than the rest of these jokes, but I guess it really wasn't.ArrylT wrote:to payskip wrote:This one needs some explanation...I have no idea how these are related.ArrylT wrote:Why do bald men hate taking the bus?
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Because whenever they get on, they are told to pay.
toupee (pronounced too/pa)
Both are 12-team 1QB PPR dynasties
🦬PRIME🦬
QB: Hurts, Howell
RB: Mixon, Jones, Sanders, Dobbins, Akers, Roschon, Dowdle, Kelley
WR: Nuk, Godwin, Cooper, Lockett, Flowers, Chark, Collins, Hollins, Tillman, Tolbert
TE: Hockenson, Chig, Trautman
Taxi: Willis, Z. White, M. Mims, T. Palmer
Hull Awaits
$450 cap, 60 contract years
QB: Lawrence $5/3, Richardson $5/5, Minshew $1/0, Jones $1/0, Heinicke $1/0, Tyrod $1/0
RB: Achane $4/4, Warren $2/4, Roschon $7/5, Dillon $4/1, Hubbard $2/1, Kelley $1/0
WR: Nuk $78/1, MT $25/1, M. Williams $1/0, JSN $21/5, Reed $4/5, Rice $4/5, M. Wilson $2/5
TE: Thomas $1/0, Hill $1/0, Parham $1/0
🦬PRIME🦬
QB: Hurts, Howell
RB: Mixon, Jones, Sanders, Dobbins, Akers, Roschon, Dowdle, Kelley
WR: Nuk, Godwin, Cooper, Lockett, Flowers, Chark, Collins, Hollins, Tillman, Tolbert
TE: Hockenson, Chig, Trautman
Taxi: Willis, Z. White, M. Mims, T. Palmer
Hull Awaits
$450 cap, 60 contract years
QB: Lawrence $5/3, Richardson $5/5, Minshew $1/0, Jones $1/0, Heinicke $1/0, Tyrod $1/0
RB: Achane $4/4, Warren $2/4, Roschon $7/5, Dillon $4/1, Hubbard $2/1, Kelley $1/0
WR: Nuk $78/1, MT $25/1, M. Williams $1/0, JSN $21/5, Reed $4/5, Rice $4/5, M. Wilson $2/5
TE: Thomas $1/0, Hill $1/0, Parham $1/0
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
What do you call a pony with a sore throat.....
--------------------
--------------------
A little hoarse.
***said with a hoarse voice****
--------------------
--------------------
A little hoarse.
***said with a hoarse voice****
Zo Nasty -12 Teams, PPR, 30 players - Keep 24
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Herbert, B Young
RB: Bijan, Warren, Z Moss, K Ingram, J kelley
WR: D London, Z Flowers, JSN, J Reed, QJ G Davis, Gallup, DPJ, M Mims, J Metchie, W Robinson, J Tolbert, J Jennings
TE: J Ferguson Fant, J Johnson, Gesicki
DST: Colts NE
K: Butker
2024 Picks
1.03,1.05,1.06,1.10,3.05,4.05,5.05,6.05
2025 Picks
1,2,3,4,5,6
_________________________
PLP - 12 Teams, PPR, 29 Active roster - Keep 23 + 4 taxi
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Burrow Dobbs, R Wilson, Stidham, Carr,
RB: CMC, Hall, K Walker, Swift, M Sanders M Carter, K Gainwell, CEH, Hunt, C Evans, E Wilson, P Taylor, D Johnson,
WR: DJM, Metcalf, AJ Brown, Hopkins, M Gallup, Chark, T Scott, P Washington, G Dortch, J Watson, R Woods
TE: M Andrews, Fant , Hudson, Higbee, L Thomas, J Johnson,
DST: SF, PHI
TAXI:
C Jones, B Strange, J Shorter, W Levis
2024 Picks
4.11,5.11,6.05, 6.11[/size]
2025 Picks
4,5,5,6,6
2026 Picks
4,5,6,6
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Herbert, B Young
RB: Bijan, Warren, Z Moss, K Ingram, J kelley
WR: D London, Z Flowers, JSN, J Reed, QJ G Davis, Gallup, DPJ, M Mims, J Metchie, W Robinson, J Tolbert, J Jennings
TE: J Ferguson Fant, J Johnson, Gesicki
DST: Colts NE
K: Butker
2024 Picks
1.03,1.05,1.06,1.10,3.05,4.05,5.05,6.05
2025 Picks
1,2,3,4,5,6
_________________________
PLP - 12 Teams, PPR, 29 Active roster - Keep 23 + 4 taxi
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Burrow Dobbs, R Wilson, Stidham, Carr,
RB: CMC, Hall, K Walker, Swift, M Sanders M Carter, K Gainwell, CEH, Hunt, C Evans, E Wilson, P Taylor, D Johnson,
WR: DJM, Metcalf, AJ Brown, Hopkins, M Gallup, Chark, T Scott, P Washington, G Dortch, J Watson, R Woods
TE: M Andrews, Fant , Hudson, Higbee, L Thomas, J Johnson,
DST: SF, PHI
TAXI:
C Jones, B Strange, J Shorter, W Levis
2024 Picks
4.11,5.11,6.05, 6.11[/size]
2025 Picks
4,5,5,6,6
2026 Picks
4,5,6,6
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
What did the lawyer name is daughter
-----------------------------
-------------------//--------
Sue
-----------------------------
-------------------//--------
Sue
Zo Nasty -12 Teams, PPR, 30 players - Keep 24
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Herbert, B Young
RB: Bijan, Warren, Z Moss, K Ingram, J kelley
WR: D London, Z Flowers, JSN, J Reed, QJ G Davis, Gallup, DPJ, M Mims, J Metchie, W Robinson, J Tolbert, J Jennings
TE: J Ferguson Fant, J Johnson, Gesicki
DST: Colts NE
K: Butker
2024 Picks
1.03,1.05,1.06,1.10,3.05,4.05,5.05,6.05
2025 Picks
1,2,3,4,5,6
_________________________
PLP - 12 Teams, PPR, 29 Active roster - Keep 23 + 4 taxi
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Burrow Dobbs, R Wilson, Stidham, Carr,
RB: CMC, Hall, K Walker, Swift, M Sanders M Carter, K Gainwell, CEH, Hunt, C Evans, E Wilson, P Taylor, D Johnson,
WR: DJM, Metcalf, AJ Brown, Hopkins, M Gallup, Chark, T Scott, P Washington, G Dortch, J Watson, R Woods
TE: M Andrews, Fant , Hudson, Higbee, L Thomas, J Johnson,
DST: SF, PHI
TAXI:
C Jones, B Strange, J Shorter, W Levis
2024 Picks
4.11,5.11,6.05, 6.11[/size]
2025 Picks
4,5,5,6,6
2026 Picks
4,5,6,6
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Herbert, B Young
RB: Bijan, Warren, Z Moss, K Ingram, J kelley
WR: D London, Z Flowers, JSN, J Reed, QJ G Davis, Gallup, DPJ, M Mims, J Metchie, W Robinson, J Tolbert, J Jennings
TE: J Ferguson Fant, J Johnson, Gesicki
DST: Colts NE
K: Butker
2024 Picks
1.03,1.05,1.06,1.10,3.05,4.05,5.05,6.05
2025 Picks
1,2,3,4,5,6
_________________________
PLP - 12 Teams, PPR, 29 Active roster - Keep 23 + 4 taxi
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Burrow Dobbs, R Wilson, Stidham, Carr,
RB: CMC, Hall, K Walker, Swift, M Sanders M Carter, K Gainwell, CEH, Hunt, C Evans, E Wilson, P Taylor, D Johnson,
WR: DJM, Metcalf, AJ Brown, Hopkins, M Gallup, Chark, T Scott, P Washington, G Dortch, J Watson, R Woods
TE: M Andrews, Fant , Hudson, Higbee, L Thomas, J Johnson,
DST: SF, PHI
TAXI:
C Jones, B Strange, J Shorter, W Levis
2024 Picks
4.11,5.11,6.05, 6.11[/size]
2025 Picks
4,5,5,6,6
2026 Picks
4,5,6,6
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
What does Bruce Lee order at Burger King?
---/------------------/------
-//---/---------------/------
Whopppaaaa
---/------------------/------
-//---/---------------/------
Whopppaaaa
Zo Nasty -12 Teams, PPR, 30 players - Keep 24
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Herbert, B Young
RB: Bijan, Warren, Z Moss, K Ingram, J kelley
WR: D London, Z Flowers, JSN, J Reed, QJ G Davis, Gallup, DPJ, M Mims, J Metchie, W Robinson, J Tolbert, J Jennings
TE: J Ferguson Fant, J Johnson, Gesicki
DST: Colts NE
K: Butker
2024 Picks
1.03,1.05,1.06,1.10,3.05,4.05,5.05,6.05
2025 Picks
1,2,3,4,5,6
_________________________
PLP - 12 Teams, PPR, 29 Active roster - Keep 23 + 4 taxi
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Burrow Dobbs, R Wilson, Stidham, Carr,
RB: CMC, Hall, K Walker, Swift, M Sanders M Carter, K Gainwell, CEH, Hunt, C Evans, E Wilson, P Taylor, D Johnson,
WR: DJM, Metcalf, AJ Brown, Hopkins, M Gallup, Chark, T Scott, P Washington, G Dortch, J Watson, R Woods
TE: M Andrews, Fant , Hudson, Higbee, L Thomas, J Johnson,
DST: SF, PHI
TAXI:
C Jones, B Strange, J Shorter, W Levis
2024 Picks
4.11,5.11,6.05, 6.11[/size]
2025 Picks
4,5,5,6,6
2026 Picks
4,5,6,6
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Herbert, B Young
RB: Bijan, Warren, Z Moss, K Ingram, J kelley
WR: D London, Z Flowers, JSN, J Reed, QJ G Davis, Gallup, DPJ, M Mims, J Metchie, W Robinson, J Tolbert, J Jennings
TE: J Ferguson Fant, J Johnson, Gesicki
DST: Colts NE
K: Butker
2024 Picks
1.03,1.05,1.06,1.10,3.05,4.05,5.05,6.05
2025 Picks
1,2,3,4,5,6
_________________________
PLP - 12 Teams, PPR, 29 Active roster - Keep 23 + 4 taxi
Start QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, TE, 2 Flex, K, DST
QB: Burrow Dobbs, R Wilson, Stidham, Carr,
RB: CMC, Hall, K Walker, Swift, M Sanders M Carter, K Gainwell, CEH, Hunt, C Evans, E Wilson, P Taylor, D Johnson,
WR: DJM, Metcalf, AJ Brown, Hopkins, M Gallup, Chark, T Scott, P Washington, G Dortch, J Watson, R Woods
TE: M Andrews, Fant , Hudson, Higbee, L Thomas, J Johnson,
DST: SF, PHI
TAXI:
C Jones, B Strange, J Shorter, W Levis
2024 Picks
4.11,5.11,6.05, 6.11[/size]
2025 Picks
4,5,5,6,6
2026 Picks
4,5,6,6
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
Thanks for the feedback & the sharing of the double entendre! To be honest I wouldnt have explained it if the other poster hadnt asked.M-Dub wrote:I actually liked this joke a lot better before you explained it. I assumed it meant that bald guys never get laid unless they pay to "get on" a hooker, and paying to ride the bus is just a harsh reminder of that sad reality. It seemed way edgier than the rest of these jokes, but I guess it really wasn't.
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!
Those were some good ones zoster!
Please feel free to share any more you find or come up with!
Please feel free to share any more you find or come up with!
Please speak to clarion contrarion before considering the use of vetos..
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