Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

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DBass218
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby DBass218 » Sun Apr 16, 2017 7:20 pm

I'll admit I got a few good laughs out of this thread......

I'll add two dumb ones that I'm pretty sure I didn't see.

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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?

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"Dam."

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What did Ernie say when Bert asked him if he wanted ice cream?

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"SureBert."
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ArrylT » Sat May 27, 2017 8:25 pm

Glad to hear you have liked some of the jokes / puns. Having a streak of writers block otherwise i'd have posted more but thanks for sharing yours - they are pretty good. :)
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ColdZealDonkeyStrike » Wed May 31, 2017 1:54 am

Man, how did I miss this thread? Definitely got some chuckles reading through it.

Why is the Energizer Bunny always running?

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He was charged with battery.

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His attorney, after contacting his client, was shocked by the charges.
Last edited by ColdZealDonkeyStrike on Wed May 31, 2017 2:05 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ColdZealDonkeyStrike » Wed May 31, 2017 1:58 am

My friend and I tried our hand at the fruit cloning business, but that all ended.

...

It turns out we don't make a good pear.
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ColdZealDonkeyStrike » Wed May 31, 2017 2:00 am

My wife claims the only thing worth living for is the pleasure of a warm room.

...

I guess you could say she's a heat-on-ist.
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ColdZealDonkeyStrike » Wed May 31, 2017 2:02 am

The Indian Chief took a dare to drink 50 gallons of earl grey in one sitting.

...

Hours later he was found dead in his tea pee.
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ArrylT » Tue Jul 18, 2017 2:33 pm

Why does Luke Skywalker enjoy roasting marshmellows?

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...

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Because he can be one with the S'mores!
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ColdZealDonkeyStrike » Mon Jul 24, 2017 2:40 am

Seaworld hosted a special camp out for Dolphin Week.

It was a good time for all in tents and porpoises.
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ArrylT » Sun Aug 13, 2017 8:29 am

What types of books are most depressed?

Thouse that are withdrawn.
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ArrylT » Sat Sep 16, 2017 11:31 am

Why are Bears fans excited this season?

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....

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Because their team could be Cohen places!
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ArrylT » Fri Oct 20, 2017 12:29 pm

When you are rushing to go into the bathroom, and finish when you leave the bathroom, what are you when you are in the bathroom??

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European!!
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby joeya2001 » Wed Dec 06, 2017 1:49 pm

This is a funny thread thank god for slow work days

Here is my joke


Why did the golfer take a extra pair of socks??

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Incase he got a hole-in-one

ba da chhhh
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ArrylT » Fri Dec 15, 2017 2:21 pm

joeya2001 wrote: Wed Dec 06, 2017 1:49 pm This is a funny thread thank god for slow work days

Here is my joke


Why did the golfer take a extra pair of socks??

....


....



....


Incase he got a hole-in-one

ba da chhhh
Thats a good one - thanks for sharing. :)

You'll find that after a while these jokes will be a groaning on you. :ewink:
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ArrylT » Wed Dec 27, 2017 9:54 pm

Why do people feel less stressed when they depart the bathroom??

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...

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Because they get to leave all their sh*t behind!
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Re: Bad Puns / Jokes - You have been Warned!

Postby ArrylT » Thu Jan 04, 2018 8:43 pm

Do you know what Aphrodite said to Athena about Hermes?

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No?

Me neither! It was all Greek to me!
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